STILL MISSING

This is another public service announcement:

Michael Jackson's $25,000.00 casket (presumably with him in it) is still missing! It has been almost a week now and no one has seen or heard from the casket or the contents!

It actually looks like a Lazy-Boy in a box! (Insert your own joke here)

This is close to being declared a National Emergency as the masses cannot be expected to go on without having a place to worship their "plastic" idol.

Again I implore you. If you know where this casket is, if you even have an inkling where this casket is, PLEASE notify the proper authorities and let's get this guy buried! He needs to be buried! We want him to be buried!

The Jackson family is "shovel ready" to get this freak show started. They have the merchandise, the booths, the cash registers and the debit/charge card machines. We need to get this show on the road so that they can get their $49.95 per person!

We once again return you to our regular scheduled programing.